Perhaps a different tact is in order...

Tript is a whore.

Go tell him I said so...

Or you could just read this: The Salem witchcraft papers, Volumes 1 through 3: verbatim transcipts of the legal documents of the Salem witchcraft outbreak of 1692 / edited and with an introduction and index by Paul Boyer and Stephen Nissenbaum. .

Or even better. Do both... ;)